Friday, June 29, 2007

Haiku Movie Reviews

It's been a while since I've done the Haiku Movie Reviews, using the ancient Japanese poetry form of 17 syllables in a 5-7-5 pattern. So, let's catch up with some in the theater and some available on DVD right now:

Children of Men
Planet without kids,
So kooks go crazy and kill.
Dark and quite British.

Day Watch
"Russians can make films?"
Action, violence and laughs.
Top-notch fantasy.

28 Weeks Later
Kids equal trouble.
Even if they are not "zombies,"
You should run away.

Vacancy
This hotel? Awful.
Some spooks, but not worth watching.
Anticlimatic.

Hills Have Eyes
Nuke mutants hate you.
Remake teaches "Stay at home.
Avoid the deserts."

Epic Movie
Unbelievable
How much SUCK can be packed

Into one movie.

Shrek 3
The real monster?
Studio executives
Who greenlit this crap.

Hostel Part 2
Tourists get killed.
But better than the first film?
Not saying that much.

Pirates of the Caribbean 3
Davy Jones? He rocks.
Second one is still better.
Asians get shafted.

Rest Stop
Why did I watch this?
Your brain cells will shrivel up.
Pure idiocy.

Wolf Creek
Lousy example
Of Australian horror.
Nothing redeeming.

Shooter
They shot his good dog
So sniper wants his revenge.
Yawn. Lots of folks die.

Pulse
This remake has none.
Based on a really good film
You should see instead.

1408
"Hotel room from hell."
King recycles some parts here.
But it is still good.

What can I say. Most of the films this month were based on travel themes. Or why not to go out of the house.

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